Disney Ride Summary

Following last week's trip to Disneyworld, in order of personal preference, best to worst, here are some of the rides at Disney World:

Soarin', Epcot
An IMAX screen, but you're hung in the middle of the bubble so it fills your vision. Great, Not scary. don't miss it. Get a fastpass early in the day.

Expedition Everest, Animal Kingdom.
A big, fun roller coaster complete with angry yeti tearing up the tracks. Don't miss it. Get a fastpass.

Space Mountain, Magic Kingdom.
A roller coaster in the dark, with little points of light bathing the place. It would probably be a second rate roller coaster, but since you can't see where you are going, it adds enormously to the experience. Don't miss. Get a fastpass.

Thunder Mountain Railroad, Magic Kingdom
A railroad themed roller coaster. Lots of fun with big swoops. Don't miss. You'll need a fastpass.

Tower of Terror, Hollywood Studios.
An elevator that goes up an down, only very fast. It is quite scary the first time you try it, but the novelty wears off the second time, since you know what's coming. Don't miss it, but don't rush back for a second run expecting it to be as good the first time. Fast passes are usually needed, but not always.

Splash Mountain, Magic Kingdom
A log flume. You get a little wet, which is fine if the weather is warm. Lots of fun. Most times a fastpass was needed.

Rock n Roller Coaster, Hollywood Studios
An indoor rollercoaster. Very fast with an upside down loop early on and a corkscrew a bit later. But is it super short. Worth trying, but it's not worth waiting in line a long time, only go if you can get a fastpass.

Spaceship Earth, Epcot
A slow moving ride through the big ball in Epcot, with displays of invention though the ages. Quite boring until you get to a bit near the end where you pass through a 3D regular grid of pointy lights, which looks very cool. It's worth sitting through the first bit to get to the bit at the end.

Mad Tea Party, Magic Kindom.
This is a bunch of large tea cups in which 2 or 3 people can sit. They rotate around, but you get to spin the cup by pulling on a disc in the center of the cup. So with a bit of muscle you can spin it really fast. A much better ride than it looks like from the outside.

Kali River Rapids, Animal Kingdom.
Here 6 of you sit in a circular floating thing and ride down a river. The thing is there are some places where 1 or 2 seats, along with their occupants, get drenched. You don't know if it will be you or not, because the boat rotates freely. Take it if the weather is warm and you will dry off quickly.

Haunted Mansion, Magic Kingdom
A slow ride through haunted theme rooms. Boring.

Test Track, Epcot
Nominally you're in a car on a test track. There's a bit at the end where it goes fast around a banked track. Frankly boring and the GM adverts grated. The 7 yr old liked it though.

Primeval Whirl, Dino-land, Animal Kingdom
This is a rollercoaster with a car that rotates as you go around. It's short, nasty and uncomfortable. It runs slowly and jerks you around. All pain, no thrills. Avoid.

It's a Small World, Magic Kingdom
Help! Let me out. It's a boat ride through millions of annoying, badly animated dolls singing and stupid tune, dressed in culturally naive outfits. No fastpass needed here.

The Carousel of Progress. Magic Kingdom
The Carousel of Boredom. Avoid. You will not need a fastpass.

Legends of Hollywood, Hollywood Studios
A super slow ride through a bunch of scenes from old Hollywood movies, with a boring commentator and a super tedious bunch of film clips at the end. This is the worst ride in the park. Shoot yourself before getting on.

Prince Caspian, Hollywood studios
I was wrong, this is the worst ride. It isn't even a ride, but they don't tell you that before you go in. They just show you a video while you stand. Ugh.